MEN-TAL HEALTH.
I am a 21st-century woman. I have been raised in a heavily patriarchal society. One that confined my place to the kitchen. It stated that I could only be addressed but not address. I could not access education and even when I could the quality was lacking. In extreme cases, I had to undergo Female Genital Mutilation. I have not only been a child bride but also harassed sexually. I have been seen as a vessel of procreation. Despite the challenges that I had to go through, I had an upper hand from my brothers.
The same men who had easy access to education. Who did not have to worry about FGM let alone a sanitary towel? These men who curated the “council of elders”, were crowned Kings and could run for office. In between the different forms of discrimination, I went through, society did cut me some slack. I am a woman, a weak emotional being. I can cry. It's that simple, I can show my emotions and no one would but an eye. Vulnerability on my part is not a form of weakness.
According to the World Health Organisation, one in five people have mental health issues. In men, the numbers are higher. Three out of four men are struggling with different mental disorders. Black men have it worse. Suicide is still the largest cause of death for men under 35. I want to shed light on this human being who has been favored on all lands. The fact that he wears pants comes with so many privileges but at a cost. He is brought up in a society that views his vulnerability as a form of weakness. A society that wants him to be man enough. Whatever that is?. A society that tells him to toughen up and not open up.
The result is that he keeps to himself. He never communicates. He never sheds a tear. He mans up literally. In doing so an epidemic by the name depression gets to him. It devours him. Pushing and pulling, stretching and wringing and finally tearing him apart. He tries to consult his version of ‘therapy’ like different women but none of this seems to cure him.
He would be later found hanging from the same man cave that he’d spend most of his time.
Men just like women need love, affection and all words of affirmation. The societal expectation that men are to shoulder everything should be done away with. We must bring vulnerability, as a core principle of emotional strength, into the framework of masculinity. We must promote healthy communication and different forms of therapy for men.
Therapy must be a conversation that we all have. It should be normalized and not critiqued negatively. Men just like women, should be allowed to be human.